How To Know If You’re Prepared for Marriage

It’s understandable when you want to spend the rest of your life with someone you are in a relationship with. Unfortunately, a healthy relationship isn’t the only sign that you’re ready for marriage. Neither is it appropriate to declare your intention to marry and then try to persuade your partner into roles that they don’t fit into or aren’t ready for. Thus, how can you determine whether you’re truly ready? Or better still ask yourself this question, “Should I get married?”

One of the most important choices you will ever make is whether or not to get married.

Dr. Robert Riordan, JD, PsyD, a professional psychologist with expertise in couples therapy and a licensed attorney and relationship specialist; Pareen Sehat, MC, RCC, gave their expert tips on whether you’re genuinely ready to be married.

Here’s how you determine when it’s appropriate to move forwardYou Are Honest With One Another

1. You Are Honest With One Another

“You both truly see one other for who they are, and you’ve all come to embrace each other for who they are right now, not for what you wish they might become later on. According to Dr. Riordan, “It’s a warning sign if you’re trying to change something fundamental about your partner.” “You are completely aware of each other’s strengths and challenges,” he continues, which is another sign that you truly know your mate. “You have each opened up and shared your inner life with the other, and you have each created space to listen deeply to—and to accept fully—the good and the not-so-good.”

2. Do You Trust your Spouse?

The cornerstone of any good partnership is mutual trust. Even though you might have love, your marriage will be tense without it. “This is really important,” Sehat says. “Consider any positive relationship you’ve ever been in, whether it be a romantic or professional one. Is trust present there?

3. Your Objectives Coincide.

Rarely do our lives take one straight path; instead, they wind and twist and turn. Are you aware of your destination? More importantly, have you and your partner had the conversation? “It’s hard to be on the same page when you’re moving in different directions,” Sehat explains. “You’re in a good place if you can support each other for the relationship’s benefit, even if your aims aren’t the same. Many annoyances later on can be avoided by being upfront and truthful about this from the start.”

4. You Both Make Effort To Make Your Relationship Work

Are you engaging in a one-sided table tennis match? You might want to postpone getting married if you’re working so hard and get nothing in return. According to Sehat, “a successful marriage is never one-sided.” “When both parties are willing to put in the work, it is a good sign that you are ready for marriage.”

5. You Feel Secured When You Are With Your Spouse

When you’re married, having a safe and secure connection will prevent years of pain. “The foundation of this starts with lack of judgment,” Sehat states. “Are you able to be authentic with this person? I would advise you to consider what it would be like to live that life for years to come if you are making every effort to be someone else. The impact this may have on your anxiety and sense of self.”

6. You Want MARRIAGE, Not Wedding

Do you ever imagine what might happen after exchanging vows and making your way down the aisle in your dreams? While the wedding is a joyous occasion, your marriage must be solid enough to endure a lifetime. “Can you see a future with this person past your wedding date?” Sehat inquires. “Do you imagine growing old with them?” Here, be absolutely truthful with yourself.

7. Your Family Likes Your Partner

A significant step is welcoming a new spouse into your family. Your decision to marry may be influenced by your family’s views, even though you shouldn’t base it on what they believe. “Although we have no control over this factor, it can be very important,” Sehat explains. “The healthiest iteration of your marriage may be facilitated by your family accepting your partner. Usually, getting there takes time. They are also establishing trust, so be patient.”

8. You Enjoy Spending Time With Your Spouse.

According to Sehat, Love and like are two different things. If you don’t like and respect someone, it doesn’t matter how much you may be fascinated with them. “We have established that you love them but do you like who they are?” she queries. “Are you in admiration of them? Do you like having them around? Consider these questions carefully after taking a step back.

9. You Can Afford To Get Married

Saying “I do” is not cheap. “A wedding is most likely your first significant endeavor as a couple,” explains Sehat. “If you can’t afford the wedding of your dreams right now, take some time to save for this and avoid financial strain right off the bat.”

10. You Can’t Imagine Your Life Without Them

You know right now you are no longer looking for a life partner. “Yes, there may be people in the world who are richer, smarter, funnier, and more attractive than your partner, but you don’t care!” states Dr. Riordan. “You want to travel through life alone now that you have found your true love. You know that your future life together would be richer in every way, and the thought of living apart from your lover breaks your heart right away.”