Betty Irabor on Love Over Pride: A Lesson from Her Marriage

While preaching against pride, Nigerian writer and columnist Betty Irabor recalled a bittersweet moment with her husband, Soni Irabor.

After one of their arguments, the Genevieve Magazine founder disclosed in a long Instagram post that she once slammed the door on her husband.

“PRIDE MUST NEVER SPEAK LOUDER THAN LOVE

This morning I found myself reflecting on that day I banged the door on my husband after one of those inconsequential tiffs—you know, the kind where we put our mouths in gear 5 and go wielding… and then suddenly you’re like Oops! Did I really say that?!

As I stormed out of our bedroom in blind rage that morning, the Holy Spirit ARRESTED me right there at the door:
Clap for yourself, Betty! You must be very proud of the disrespect you just showed your husband. Now go back and apologise.”
The voice was clear and loud!

I froze. Apologize? Me?

But conviction wouldn’t let me be. I turned right back to the room—only to be chased out. Ah! I didn’t expect that, but I deserved it. My heart was heavy the entire day; peace eluded me.

Later that evening, I heard him chuckling at a movie, and I knew it was time. Humbled and sober, I approached him. My knees may have been weak from aches, but I still went down on them in utmost remorse and said,
“Soni, I’m sorry. Please forgive me.”

Guess what my husband did? Hmmm!!
He reached out to help me up, saying with urgency in his voice;
“Ah, Betty, get up, get up, remember your knees—you’ll hurt them.”

I was moved to tears by the compassion in his voice.
It wasn’t the reaction I expected. I thought he would chase me away again, but he was more concerned about my knees than my offence.

He didn’t exploit the situation!

That broke me. But then that’s my husband for you—kindness and compassion personified.

The truth is, knowing when to retreat or surrender in a marital dispute is not a sign of weakness — it’s wisdom.
It’s the understanding that peace is more valuable than being right.
That sometimes love whispers, “Let it go,” even when pride wants the last word.

We must never exploit our spouse’s good nature.

Pride must never speak louder than love.

You see, marriage isn’t about who wins an argument; it’s about who guards the peace.

NOW GO AND MAKE YOUR OWN PEACE WITH YOUR SPOUSE!”.

Live with Purpose, Love with Passion. Remember to be happy
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‎One ❤️❤️❤️
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‎Rose Ajieh
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