HOW DO YOU KNOW HE OR SHE IS THE ONE? PART I

Now that the decision is made to marry, you have been able to convince yourself that you are ready to take it to the next level, the next question is who is the one to spend the rest of your life with? Who is that person you are not afraid to wake up to every day for the rest of your life? The one of whom you can never get tired? Who is that one person in the whole world you want to make and execute plans with? Who is that special one that makes you happy, confident, and secure, this beautiful or handsome creature into whose hands you can confidently entrust your life? Who is this wonderful being that made everything suddenly change?

I have always believed that every creature has a soulmate. Some patiently wait and look out for their soulmate, and when they meet him or her, things naturally fall into place, and the rest is history.

Some just live their lives believing that what will be will be “que cerra cerra”, and not even believing in love, they just find love, and everything clicks and their lives change tremendously.

Some never found the love of their lives, either because they are impatient, neither believing in themselves nor such things as soul mates. Some had their lives made so miserable by those closest to them that they missed it entirely.
Some find their soul mate after they are already married to someone else, maybe even to a truly loving partner.

The thing is, when you are with someone that does not make you feel complete, you might be staying in the relationship for the care and love you receive or out of pity. In many cases, destiny takes its course, or some of us, out of our own free will, gave up, because when God created us, He gave us the freedom to choose between right or wrong, good or bad. Most times, it is just our choices. Sometimes I wonder which is more difficult – the decision to get married or the discernment to know if he or she is the one

I have asked this question over and over again from married folks or those planning their wedding. How did they realize he or she is the one for them? And I have always received different answers. But the majority had this to say… “when you find the one, you will just know”. They would say, “I don’t know how to explain it, but you will know this is the one you want to spend the rest of your life with”

Some Christian folks say you will have this peace and serenity whenever you are with the person, or whenever you think of him or her, no matter what you are going through. Some folks say that when you meet the one, things just fall into place, and you have this deep conviction that he or she is the one. Some people have admitted that they did not start out knowing he or she was the one, but, along the line, some events took place that made them realize he or she is the one.

When you find your soulmate or “the one”, you may not recognize them right away. They may not always be able to finish your sentences or know what you are thinking. They would likely know how you feel about having children, what you believe about disciplining children, whether you want to live in the city or the country.
It is not a “falling in love” as much as it is a growing in love that counts. It is not impossible, but it is truly a rare event for someone to love a person at first sight. It is hard to look into the heart and know what a person is like. The only way you can know what type of person they are is by spending time with them.

Whatever the instance is for you, there are questions you need to ask yourself and your spouse to determine if he or she is the one you truly want to spend the rest of your life with. These include his or her core values, beliefs about children, religion, style of living, finances, or attitude, beliefs about life, marriage, and other essentials.

Please stay tuned for the second part of “how do you know he or she is the one.

“Excerpt from “Marry And Wed For Good”, written by Agnes Isika.